NICU

The lord must feel I am a pretty strong mama with putting my lil guy in here. I am so thankful for the NICU and the nurses there, I just want my baby home and with me all the time. 2 am and I knew I would not sleep til I saw him so I snuck out doing my best not to wake mom. I had not had a chance to just cry so I sat in his room a cried til one of the lovely nurses came in to ask about breast pumping and so began the first lesson. And that is just one reason I am so great full for the nurses.

" I am more"

I am more than a smile, than this skin that holds me all in.
I am more than a girl, than a person you may think you know.
I am more than you can see, more than you will know.
There is a light, a power shining with in this shell you see.
A being as old as time its self.
I am that light, the soft giggle you hear on the breeze.
For I am much more than you see.
A mother connected to mother earth her self.
A being of ice, fire, light and love, the whisper of a memory.
There is more to me than you will ever know.
A sister to all and friend to be.
A dreamer, a fighter, a lover and giver,
I am more than the clothes that cover me, or the shape I bare.
So when you see me please remember, there is more.
And when you look in the mirror see that there is more there too.

Been awhile

Its been awhile. There has not been a whole lot going on really, I am kinda in the waiting part of the pregnancy with only 3 weeks left. Yes I still have some things coming up like back pains and brax and hix. Oh and last weekend I had strep throat. It was not really fun but it did not last too long, I have been tired every since. In fact my life today was mostly sleeping... mom says that it could be a combination of getting over strep and my body getting ready for labor.

Things I am looking forward to...

1. Fall! I love the fall colors and the cool weather. The time for Jeans and soft sweaters. mmmm Hot coco with Vanilla creamer and my homemade pumpkin chocolate chip cookies. This fall I get to introduce my son to all its beauties. Orange and gold, red and yellow. Pumpkins and Acorns! There is just some magic to fall. I guess really each season does but I am looking forward to fall.. and then just wait I will be the same about winter and spring and then summer again.




2. Dying my hair. Lol I know its silly.. but I miss my hair. Well I guess its not really my hair my hair is now a brown with slight red tints. It use to be very blond with some red to it but it darkened over time. Now I really love having Red so yes I will tell the truth I love my Red dyed hair!



3. Jeans with out the maturity belly pocket thing.  I love my jeans lol.

4. Herbal tea with out having to look up to see if I can have it or not.

5. Seeing those that I miss so much. They know who they are.. I know I should not be ashamed to state how much I miss them but I am. I stress out about how far away I am and how it was my choice to move here. I just some times feel like I cut my self off. I know this is where I get to be, I would not know what to do if i was not here being a single mom with no job.