Honestly

I am still slightly freaking out over something that happened at the baby shower. Some one with a young baby was there and my mom felt I should hold the lil baby well all was good sweet baby and all just when he started to fuss I was at a lost of what to do... The mommy told  me he most likely needed burped and my mom told me to place him to my shoulder and pat his back, ya all stuff I know just well I freaked. Holding that baby even tho he was a big baby for his age I was not sure what to do I still don't it upset me. Here I am so close to having my own baby and I can't even hold a baby without freaking out and handing the baby back to his mommy as fast as I can glad for the excuse of having to pee. Here I tell myself I will be the best mom ever and I am clueless!! Scared and clueless. I don't like it at all. Something about holding that baby sent me into a panic I can't shake.