True emotion

When you look at my photos most likely you see joy.. But really that is not always my true emotion for its not popular to place for all to see your sadness or worries. You see I am fighting depression I know this and am willing to admit it now. I force my self to use the tools I know yet it's hard when you have to force your self to even get out of bed. True emition; i feel alone, isolated, emotional, forgotten, like I am spinning out of control, scared, like a slow sad rain, and angry.  I know I have power over this but it's like my will power is gone. And tho the world sees me smiling inside I am struggling. I want every thing to be ok. Please let everything be ok...