Live like your dieing

I had a dream I was leaving you and there was nothing in my power I could do about it. Home was calling me back for a greater purpose yet I did not want to go. I was fighting to stay with all of you, I was fighting to stay with my son. In this dream tho I knew I would be going and time was growing too short. I feel I did what I would really choose under the knowledge of leaving. I held my son every moment of the day stayed awake every night holding him as I watched him sleep, I stared into his deep brown eyes as I told him hundereds upon thousands of times how much his mommy loved him. I wrote him letters after letters of how dear he is to me for I knew in this dream he would not remember his mommy when he grew older. I curled in bed with my mom and daddy at one point for that comfort once more I wrote them both letters of how dear they are to me. I made so many phone calls to friends and family just to talk and hear their voices once again. I told those dear to me how much I loved them and wrote so many letters to dear loved ones to have once I was gone. Some of the people I wrote was; Alveda, my grandparents, Celeste, Ryan, Mario, dori, Austin p, even wil (telling him thank you for the lessons), and a few others that are now fading along with the memory of the dream. I knew one thing for sure they would not see me any more but I would see them. I would always see them for that was one reason I was being called home, to watch over them my loved ones. I would be in each rainfall, dancing in each sunset, kneeling with each of them as they prayed, unseen as I stood between them and danger,gleaming with the moonlight on the water,  I would be in the wind as it glided by and in the whisper of crunching leaves under their feet. I would be there..

It was so interesting of a dream sad but almost rejoyful as I knew I would be where I belonged still. No I am sure I am healthy and going to be around for a long time yet to drive you all crazy! And I know with all my heart that my time here is not close to ending for know my son gets to have this crazy woman as his mom to grow up with but the dream was defiantly  food for thought. What would you do if you knew you were going to leave? Would you put aside seeing those you love to another week? Would you fight with those around you as much? Would you love deeper? I know what I would do and I also know I am going to do my best to start living my life now instead of assuming there is another time to live it.